Poodle Gifts

"He won't bite, but he carries with him a large repository of judgements."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

Sergeant Jones gave the assurance that they had an 'assortment' of leads back at the station. . .

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

"Well, if she didn't insist on giving me this stupid look, she wouldn't need to buy me coats in winter..."

"Wow, what a DILF."

"Oooooh....a western wear dog cone. Sexy!"

"Yeah well, now that we're married, he's not making any effort: he hasn't been to a grooming appointment in months!"

"Sit and stay were no problem but she's hit a wall with multivariable calculus.'

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

'Hey Are you sniffing at my girlfriend's ae'

I bark and bark and bark. . . Therefore I am.

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

A perm for a woman and her dog.

"So I play this guy named Stan Snorkel who finds a big, gray poodle..."

"Sure, my dad and my granddad and my granddad's dad were all domesticated. But that doesn't mean I have to be."

"A poodle? It's sort of a dog with an afro."

An inbred poodle.

"Wanna go out?"

''Pet of the Year', That's me!'

'First we had her fixed, then we had her gussied up.'

"I'm about ready to forgive the French."

Best in Heat.

Sun. Rain.

'Sorry Mum, but the silly haircut kind of ruins my body builder image...'

Every year, the poodleboys gather to test their skills in the Beverly Kills Rodeo Championships.

'Not funny, Lulu!'

"Can they REALLY be descended from wolves..??"

'Steady Lulu, steady, ...HEEL!' - The Rare Poodle Retriever.

Non-working dog, please help

The poodle plague of 1712 crippled France's overpriced dog industry for decades.

A new stylist, with fussing and savoury biscuits. . . but overall, Bev was very happy with the result!!

'I suggest you reconsider your approach to responsible dog breeding.'