Poodle Gifts

"He won't bite, but he carries with him a large repository of judgements."

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

Owner Looks Like Poodle.

Oh yeh? Well at least he doesn't get fleas.

Sergeant Jones gave the assurance that they had an 'assortment' of leads back at the station. . .

"Oooooh....a western wear dog cone. Sexy!"

"Wow, what a DILF."

"Well, if she didn't insist on giving me this stupid look, she wouldn't need to buy me coats in winter..."

Dog wearing jumper to hide his spots.

"Yeah well, now that we're married, he's not making any effort: he hasn't been to a grooming appointment in months!"

"Sit and stay were no problem but she's hit a wall with multivariable calculus.'

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

I bark and bark and bark. . . Therefore I am.

'Hey Are you sniffing at my girlfriend's ae'

"Wanna go out?"

A perm for a woman and her dog.

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

"Sure, my dad and my granddad and my granddad's dad were all domesticated. But that doesn't mean I have to be."

An inbred poodle.

"So I play this guy named Stan Snorkel who finds a big, gray poodle..."

"A poodle? It's sort of a dog with an afro."

''Pet of the Year', That's me!'

"Can they REALLY be descended from wolves..??"

'First we had her fixed, then we had her gussied up.'

Every year, the poodleboys gather to test their skills in the Beverly Kills Rodeo Championships.

'Sorry Mum, but the silly haircut kind of ruins my body builder image...'

'Not funny, Lulu!'

"I'm about ready to forgive the French."

Best in Heat.

Sun. Rain.

'Steady Lulu, steady, ...HEEL!' - The Rare Poodle Retriever.

Non-working dog, please help

The poodle plague of 1712 crippled France's overpriced dog industry for decades.

A new stylist, with fussing and savoury biscuits. . . but overall, Bev was very happy with the result!!

'I suggest you reconsider your approach to responsible dog breeding.'