Politics Punsters Pillows

Iran Nuke Treaty

British savings accounts

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

Politically Correct Snowperson

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

Tequila Mockingbird

"We're developing a plan to fix this."

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

"Let's not try to make this symbolic. Of anything."

"After searching for the sun all night, it finally dawned on me..."

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

"This, Yorik... Do you know him well?"

'On Wall Street, both stocks and bonds dropped on news that adversity is good for the soul.'

"...and we hope that, for a cyber-crime, you will consider a cyber-penalty."

"Read me the one about Ali Obama and the Forty Community Organizers."

Statue of Liberty: Out of Service

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

'Scientists claim they have found the 'God Particle'. In a related story, they are still looking for the 'Job Creator Particle'.'

'When I said I was going to resign my contract, I meant re-sign my contract for another five years!'

Statistics Research: You Can Fool 45% of the People 55% of the time, but you can't fool all the people all the time.

"I feel that I've been given a unique opportunity to speak out on the issues."

'Mr. President, you have a phone call. It's the First Hen.'

My, my, we're justs a little overprotective of our propriety knowledge, aren't we?

'This is what I mean about inadequate interagency cooperation.'

"You've placed me in a difficult position here, Malcolm."

Hamlet.

I wonder who's Kissinger now?

'Your North Pole is wobbling - you should see a spin doctor.'

Since you conduct only thought-experiments, we were hoping you would, from time to time, come up with some thought-results.

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Political Science

Vote Centrist