Police Humor Lover Pillows

"There you are. I've been looking everywhere for you!"

'Finished your beat already, Mackay?!' 'Aye, Sarge. We found a short cut.'

'We going to move to a smaller base.'

"If we could explain it in Hip-hop, officer?. . . It would be like this!"

'Looks like the latest crime figures have been stolen.'

Excessive Paperwork

"Just put one foot directly in front of the other, sir, and walk in as straight a line as possible."

For the last time, officer, I'm absolutely, positively sure it was number four.

'Asking for a lawyer was a good move. You can't outsmart the cops by yourself.' (Lawyer is a puppet being operated by policeman).

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

'Have you any idea what speed you were doing, sir?'

Serious Crime Squad, Light-Hearted Crime Squad, Happy As Larry Crime Squad.

'...if you don't stop..er..singing Mr Bieber I'll arrest you for possessing an offensive weapon as well as drunk driving.'

The Automatic Policeman

'Donut shop is down the hall to your right - and I'm not answering any more questions without my lawyer present.'

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

Oh, sorry, I didn

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

'He had it coming..He said my mother had an arse like the back of a cart horse!'

'Great News - it's not psoriasis . . . it's just an itchy trigger finger.'

'Even my three year old doesn't believe in that last one.'

'Number three. Definitely number three.'

"It's a disaster Sir: most new recruits suffer from some kind of ADHD or phone addiction and can't follow a trail for more than 30 seconds..."

Police dancing behind line - titled 'Police Line Dancing'.

"Avon calling..!"

"Come on out, Rocco. We know you're in there."

'Just showing him how much taller he needs to be to join your lot!'

'I'm not a bad driver, they're bad pedestrians.'

Police Warning - Flash photography can seriously damage your driving licence.

Christmas Police

Policemen

"I'll have the good cocktail." "I'll have the bad cocktail."

'Okay, sit there. . . but give me the keys.'

Good Cop, Bad Cop, Lousy Cop

"Why do you keep saying I have the right to remain silent."