Polar Punsters Gifts

INUIT, OUT-UIT The Inuit'sEskimo's version of office In Out trays.

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

You too?! I go around feeling half asleep all the time also!

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Tree house.

Ideas Ahead of their Time

Water is discovered on the moon....

Another Turning Point in History. Oh, the heck with it -- I'll never get these antlers right. Mickey Moose.

STRIP God' s dog urinating on planet Earth

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

'Is the water cold?'

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

'Tony can't come out to play now, he's on his orthodontopole!'

'I'd never bite the hand that feeds me - but I won't pull its finger, either.'

Uranus always gets a bad rap. Tap tap tap tap tap. What do you mean, dorkboy? I mean, no matter how mature people think they are, they always, always want to chuckle when they say "Uranus." Come on, Sadie. You know you want to smirk, even if it's in secret. What if I told you Uranus is slightly bigger than Neptune? Not chuckling! Uranus is always the butt of the joke.

"Hallelujah!"

"Excuse me, do you have a moment to talk about that?"

"Hey Kevin! Care to enter the office football pool?"

"I call it decking - it will be all the rage in a few years."

Hamlet.

Hands off my IP

'Your North Pole is wobbling - you should see a spin doctor.'

'If you want to improve your golf score, the best wood to use is a pencil with an eraser.'

Large Hadron Colliider-scope

Fisherman catches swimmer.

"The planet appears to be inhabitable but more like low-income inhabitable."

Shark in the swimming pool.

I have a higher escape velocity than you! It has nothing to do with being clingy!

'Remember this test, Ms. Hart? Nineteen ninety. Multiple choice. You asked which of these is not a planet, and I checked Pluto...'

The Dark Side of the Moon.

He's very defensive about his personal space.

Cutting round an igloo...

'I'm the veterinarian of Cheshire who spays and neuters Cheshire pets.'

Professional Cell Phone Accessories

Where's Slinky going? To Florida, for spring training.