Poker Rookie Gifts

'Do you have anything more basic than Poker for Ignoramuses, Dolts, Blockheads & Dopes?'

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

Dogs and their thoughts

Little league world series of poker.

"Mr Frimley will see you now."

"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

'How about a game of cards?'

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

'According to this book, the casino has a slight edge in this game.'

"Okay, I'll renew your contract and raise you five sick days."

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"I'm watching the dog cheat at solitaire."

"Stag poker"

Dogs Playing Poker in the Park

"Incidentally, my men's group has retrograded into a poker game."

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

'No, you can't play poker tonight! The last time you played, you lost Schewig-Holstein!'

'I'll see your diuretic and raise you three anti-depressants.'

"I'll see your Sirloin and raise you a New York Strip."

Playing cards.

Before Dogs Knew How To Play Poker,

'I'll raise you, Lazarus...'

'He's not much fun in the evenings -- he's solar powered.'

"Botox."

'Once again, I fold.'

It was indeed an awkward moment, but Mrs Claus had nailed them all...finally, the truth was out!!

"You can get good cards but still have terrible luck."

A war would have been bad enough, but losing Alsace-Lorraine in a poker game?

"One word from you when the wife gets home and you're next Sunday's roast!"

Worm Bed