Plumbing Disaster Aficionado Gifts

"It appears the water pressue on the bidet misfired and she blew up like a pufferfish..."

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

' ... and this is the half bath.'

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

Volcanic ash...

"I guess it's too late to warn you that I turned off the hot water."

"This does NOT count as fixing the leaky faucet, mister!"

'If the drain's clogged with food, why not clean it out with some high fiber bran flakes?'

A sudden draft. The moment he first felt comfortable calling himself a plumber.

'My phone's been tapped!'

"I'm afraid your bath is directly connected to the melting polar ice caps."

Septic Fields Forever.

'Well... at least we know the basement doesn't leak.'

'Here's the problem,the pilot light went out.'

'I've been having a lot of out of potty experiences, lately.'

'My client is therefore NOT guilty of malpractice. All he is guilty of is an error in judgment. He should have decided to be a plumber."

"I'm charging extra to remove the duct tape you thought would work."

"There's something wrong with your dinner."

Dave's How to Puke Book.

I hate it when they start without us.

'It's Clegged up, Mrs - I'm afraid it means another U-turn!'

'The gods are angry with the airlines.'

Leaking washing machine.

Hot Water from the bath.

'That's your limescale problem sorted.'

'Darn! The wife is gonna kill me for not reading the label.'

'Ok, who didn't leave a faucet to drip so the pipes wouldn't freeze!'

"You should have called earlier."

History Class Moved to Room 318. The class relocated because of this mess. The pipe breaking was a "history changing" event.

'I don't want to go up after Yang's dad.'

'Yeah, I think we might need to call a plumber. It's overflowing again.'

I have a low flow toilet ... but not by design.