Plumbing Aficionados Gifts

My mission is to get to the spacestation before the plumber does!

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

' ... and this is the half bath.'

'Can you take the lid off this jar for me...?'

'No it's still not fixed'

"I guess it's too late to warn you that I turned off the hot water."

"This does NOT count as fixing the leaky faucet, mister!"

'If the drain's clogged with food, why not clean it out with some high fiber bran flakes?'

A sudden draft. The moment he first felt comfortable calling himself a plumber.

'My phone's been tapped!'

'When did you swallow the coin?'

"Excuse me Mr. Plumber, my son just called, please be careful not to disturb his genetically altered aquatic scorpion colony."

"And this is the ultimate in low-flush toilets!"

Septic Fields Forever.

"I'm afraid your bath is directly connected to the melting polar ice caps."

'Well... at least we know the basement doesn't leak.'

'Here's the problem,the pilot light went out.'

'My client is therefore NOT guilty of malpractice. All he is guilty of is an error in judgment. He should have decided to be a plumber."

"I'm charging extra to remove the duct tape you thought would work."

I hate it when they start without us.

'It's Clegged up, Mrs - I'm afraid it means another U-turn!'

'That's your limescale problem sorted.'

'Ok, who didn't leave a faucet to drip so the pipes wouldn't freeze!'

"I see you've had a go at mending the dripping tap."

"You should have called earlier."

'I don't want to go up after Yang's dad.'

'I represent a broad-based coalition of anti-pipe interests....'

"If I can't be a plumber's apprentice, can I be a plumber's helper?"

'Mom, I said if you want to live in this neighbourhood, keep a weapon at your disposal.'