Plumbing Aficionados Gifts

My mission is to get to the spacestation before the plumber does!

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

' ... and this is the half bath.'

'Can you take the lid off this jar for me...?'

'No it's still not fixed'

"I guess it's too late to warn you that I turned off the hot water."

"This does NOT count as fixing the leaky faucet, mister!"

'Not only did I fix the leak, but when you run the hot water it plays 'Harlem Nocturne'.'

'If the drain's clogged with food, why not clean it out with some high fiber bran flakes?'

A sudden draft. The moment he first felt comfortable calling himself a plumber.

'My phone's been tapped!'

'When did you swallow the coin?'

"Excuse me Mr. Plumber, my son just called, please be careful not to disturb his genetically altered aquatic scorpion colony."

Septic Fields Forever.

"And this is the ultimate in low-flush toilets!"

"I'm afraid your bath is directly connected to the melting polar ice caps."

'Well... at least we know the basement doesn't leak.'

'Here's the problem,the pilot light went out.'

'I've been having a lot of out of potty experiences, lately.'

"I'm charging extra to remove the duct tape you thought would work."

'My client is therefore NOT guilty of malpractice. All he is guilty of is an error in judgment. He should have decided to be a plumber."

'It's Clegged up, Mrs - I'm afraid it means another U-turn!'

I hate it when they start without us.

'That's your limescale problem sorted.'

"I see you've had a go at mending the dripping tap."

'Ok, who didn't leave a faucet to drip so the pipes wouldn't freeze!'

'I don't want to go up after Yang's dad.'

'Vienna Brass Ensemble'

History Class Moved to Room 318. The class relocated because of this mess. The pipe breaking was a "history changing" event.

'I represent a broad-based coalition of anti-pipe interests....'

I have a low flow toilet ... but not by design.