Playground Comedian Gifts

'Oh come on, there's only one of them, you just have to keep an eye out.'

'That's disgusting, I mean, do your business and get out,'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

'Now Featuring Gas-Fired Microwave Campfires!'

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

Busking, "Stop worrying your father for money."

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

"Gerald converted the barbecue grill to natural gas."

Jim Morrison Goes Camping

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

"Here! Let me get you all in!"

"Wow! That's an amazing welding project!"

'Does the hunter I just ate make me look fat?'

Mood swings: Swing 1 - 'Looks like it's going to be another wonderful day!' Swing 2 - 'Who CARES link brain! I hope it rains acid!!' Swing 3 - 'I think i'm going to CRRRY!'

Deer about to cut rope of gun being lifted to hunter in tree.

I'm trying out for the spring play. You'll be great! Ha! You'll be grateful to be an usher, Meryl Creep. Yeah. The good parts go to real actors. Sigh. The arts are sooo uplifting.

"Oh, it's just more white-male stuff."

Excess Baggage: If your vacation plans include 'Getting Back to Nature' be careful what you wish for.

'You feel awkward? You're the one who said we ought to hunt bare.'

"My wife is always on to me about eating more vegetarians."

'How are they biting?'

'Never go berry pickin' on an empty stomach.'

Scary Marshmallow Campfire Stories.

"I can't wait to get to the campground...back to mother nature!"

No petting in the pool!

"I hear the food's good. But try to get a table."

'Your turn to go for water. . .'

The biggest fish.

It's a Four Seasons sleeping bag.

'Hey, Pete - I found a set of tracks.'

Pop-up camper set-up problems.

Get out of the kiddy pool Harold!