Playful Pragmatist Gifts

Hazardous Wastes R Us.

'Do I have to fetch the newspaper? -- Peter Hitchens always leaves a bad taste in my mouth!'

'It's a zen diaphragm.'

Ice Cream Surgeon

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

'Who's this 'Art in Heaven' guy you keep talking about?'

Playdough's The Republic

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

'She'll never look for me here.'

'But, Mom. Think of all the leftovers he can thankfully eliminate.'

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

Hamlet

"Stock options won't do it. I'll also need a ball of yarn."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

A child as a pet substitute.

"You're missing the whole gestalt of Frisbee!"

Philosopher trading cards.

Kids playing with the cardboard box instead of the expensive toys.

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

'Let the record show that I suggested primordial souffl'ee.'

Jimmy had a very active imagination.

'This is alphabet soup, Mom. I don't use the alphabet in the summer.'

'I am constantly diversifying my toy portfolio.'

'There goes another one. Galileo, don't you have any idea what makes them do that?'

Noughts and crosses hugging and kissing.

Toys from the Pre School of Hard Knocks - Stumbling Blocks.

"Game of checkers? Okay, but I'm watching every move you make."

'How did he make the world in six days?'

"Just how many ways are there to skin a cat?"

"I'll trade you my cupcake for your head lice."

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The Meaning of Life