Playful Police Tales Gifts

'....and how big was this bee, Sir?'

OK! I promise that the questions will be easy!

"Number 2. Step forward please."

"So then how do you explain trigonometry, tough guy!"

Missing Persons - "50 years old, 16 stone and bad tempered... Are you sure you want her back?"

"Alright, I'll talk. Just please, stop with the good-cop, ab-cop routine."

'I'm in the not-so-serious crime squad, actually'

"Me? A retired canine officer. They let me go when they found out I couldn't smell fear any more."

'Doesn't ring any bells...'

Melted Snow Man behind police cordon

'I don't think the killer would in the garden...that'd be waaaay too obvious.'

First Speeding Fine.

Mr Potatohead in the witness protection program.

"They're gaining on us - start throwing the doughnuts."

'Let's do the Good Dog, Bad Dog routine.'

Where were you on the night of December 24th between 10pm and 5am

'Hey, I think that's him: alligator riding motorcycle, wearing goggles and a bandana - hold it - there's no bandana.'

Might Versus Right.

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

Messing Up My Metrics

"Hey, let's mix it up a bit today and have you be the bad cop."

Good news - we've found your car.

Waking the Dead.

Wimpy Harry

'Freeze!' (policeman to snowman)

'I don't think that Magritte chappie has really got what it takes to be a police artist.'

"Policing's not what it was..."

'Objection.' - 'Objection overruled.'

"So, where's the fire? And brimstone?"

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

Crooks

'He arrested two kids yesterday. One for drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. He charged one and let the other off!'

'No, it's not number four either, but he does look like my ex-husband. Yeah, let's go with number four.'

'We know you're in there Bannerwitz! Now open the dam door!!'