Pizza Business Owner Gifts

'Can't he ever use a different kind of chart?'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"This place is one of New York's best-kept secrets."

"You said the cauliflower is locally grown – would you elaborate?"

Fast food. Even faster food

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

Updated Nursery Rhyme #27.

'I'll have you know sir, that we used the finest columbian coffee beans in that dishwater.'

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

Try to guess the continent dining...

"Something romantic, perhaps?"

Mac's Bait and Sushi Shop

Today's special... donuts.

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

"Why don't you ever fetch anything good like a pizza?"

'Mom's Diner, Turkey Sandwich Special, $2.00.'

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

Kitchen Kapers

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

Desert $2.75. See? -- It wasn't a typo.

Bar snacks served in bird-feeders.

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"I understand this diner has quite a reputation."

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

Hashimoto's Restaurant - Sushi Like Mother Used to Make!

"This is our soft opening."

"The food isn't bad, but I don't care much for the floor show!"

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.