Pizzeria Patron Gifts

'It's my favorite.'

Tut and Carmen.

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

'Can't he ever use a different kind of chart?'

'Pepperoni: Muse of Pizza'

The Velvet Mesquite

Sm. Pepperoni & Mushroom Cloud

"I can't even remember what we were fighting about."

"I didn't invent the wheel. I invented the pizza."

'Say, Hon. . . the pizza's burning.'

"Carpe pizza"

"And you guarantee it's free if it isn't delivered within thirty minutes?"

'Relax, dad, I haven't been in a classroom for months because all my college classes are online!'

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

In-House Entertainment Consists Of Man Riding Pizza Cutter Cutting Giant Pizza While Making a Pizza

Luigi's Career Change From Pizza Shop Owner to Masseuse Goes Smoothly...

'Here's the meat pizza you ordered. You don't have to tip me, because I ate the meat.'

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

Businessman dreaming of pie charts when he sees a pizza.

"Anchovies?... I would have thought you'd seen enough of them. After all, you've been catching them all day."

Papa's Pizza delivered in under 30 minutes.

The finer points of marriage.

'He's in training for the marathon, he watches it every year.'

'I WARNED you we had the largest slice in town!'

'I didn't have time to hunt'

"And not only do I make my own pizza sauce, I have a special way of crushing the tomatoes!"

"Now we wait."

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

People were amazed by the dexterity of the automatic pizza-making machine.

"While you were fighting for an equal number of slices, I was lobbying to deregulate their size!"

Tonight, on the microwave channel... chicken pot pie!

The art of pizza