Pill Popper Ponderer Gifts

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

"That's five votes for In The Midst of Winter....three votes for The Hollow Ground....and, again, one vote for Moby-Dick."

"It's about the murder of an editor who refuses to publish a writer's work..."

'Time for your pills.'

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

'I'll see your diuretic and raise you three anti-depressants.'

"They've swapped the pub for staying in and taking their meds."

Medication for the elderly

"Sometimes I wonder about what our patients have to take."

Amnesia Clinic: "Take one of these pills whenever you remember to."

'You must take these pills for the rest of your life.' - 'But there're only 25 in here.'

'As is the fashion these days, it's about nothing.'

"I appreciate you have a real passion for music Mr Hibberd. . . but I can see you're going to struggle with the piano."

He's very disciplined about his writing, three hours staring at a blank screen every morning and five in the afternoon.

'You forgot you list of possible side-effects.'

"If Foucault's Pendulum is correct - 15 degrees per sidereal hour times the side of the latitude - then I'm an hour late for lunch."

'Today, stocks dropped on poll numbers that 60% of people expected it to drop.'

A man about to plug in a lamp looks at electric sockets on the wall that say 'Solar,' 'Hydro Electric' and 'Nuclear.'

Six months later they would be sharing the Nobel Prize, but for now all they could do was stare in amazement at what they had discovered...two incredibly well preserved specimens from the styrofoam age.'

'Can I trust a Doctor whose prescriptions have absolutely no side effects?'

'Let me know if these weight-loss pills actually work.'

"These have severe side effects but they may not have enough time to bother you."

'It's not quite ready. Come back in 15 minutes.'

'This container lists only one hundred of the most common side effects. More can be found on the manufacturer's website.'

Energy speculation.

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

"I wonder if he's talking to me?"

"This is a selection from my novel about a writers' group that has one real writer and five wanna-be b*****s."

"What d'you say we try sneaking out before the last one?"

Wrong pills

"They can't cure the common cold, but why would they want to?"

"That's just the meds kicking in."

A tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it.

"Well, you've fianlly done it! No more rainforest left!"