Picky Plate Planner Gifts

"Can't I give him my broccoli? He likes carrots."

"I modeled this one after me. He hates vegetables, too..."

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

"I'm busy this afternoon, but I can crayon you in for Saturday."

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

Cindy's imaginary friend has the day off so the agency send over a temp to fill in.

"Please don't kill me."

'I'd like to leave my pacemaker to the medical institute, my artificial lung to the research center, my false teeth to the dental clinic, my dacron arteries...'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

"This grade doesn't fit into my five-year plan!"

'I see you've renamed your portfolios Moe, Larry and Curley.'

"You're right, Pierre, they are licking their plates."

"She doesn't eat raw zebra... Where can we get Alaska wild salmon in cream truffle sauce in the middle of Africa?"

"I'll have the carrot cake, hold the carrots."

"I have to know who brought this disgusting eucalyptus casserole!"

'It's a very realistic set that even comes with contract specifications and outrageous bid proposals.'

'...plus, an annual molting leave!'

No, he wants the other one … No, not that one … No, to your right … No, above that one …

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

Me, Alice and God

"If they don't like the food, try to explain to them how hard it is to cook really good food."

Gracie hatches a plan to trap Santa.

School Trip To The Beach

'To err is human. To really screw up requires a plan.'

'Yuck! My creamed corn is polluting my mashed potatoes!'

'Dear, some friends dropped by for potluck.'

We're sunk. Everyone's supposed to bring their Grandma's best dish to the potluck. Don't panic. Helen's Grandma was from Scotland. Yeah. But the Patakis cook Indian feasts. And the Mercantis still make 10 course Italian dinners. What was your Granny's specialty? Jell-o cube salad. Mmm ... sweet or savory?

O'Leary's Monuments

'We should have bought the piano first, and built the igloo around it.'

Chess Chef

'We'll have to eat out tonight -- I forgot to defrost the walrus.'

"Want to have a few pies after work?"

"You always said I could be what ever I want to be. I want to be someone who doesn't eat vegetables."

"Janet and Bob are coming to dinner on October 6th. Better plant eight more carrots and three more potatoes this spring."