Phone Etiquette Fun Pillows

"Who on earth would call on a landline? How rude!"

'I'll get back to you when I'm myself, Eddie.'

"This may take a minute as my mom's menu options have changed."

"You have reached the Office of Status Quo. Relax. No need to listen carefully. Our menu options never change."

'I won't be taking any more calls today. I threw my phone out the window.'

'Oh...the IRS called. Something about an audit. I told them we weren't interested.'

"Are you busy or are you at work?"

Call centre musicians

'I can't talk... I'm in the quiet carriage.' - '3...2...1...' - 'What? I can't hear you... you're breaking up...' - 'Brace! Brace!' - 'I said 'I'm in the quiet carriage'!!!' - 'Irony crash.'

"Dave's away from his desk, I'm afraid. Can I take a message, or read you his browser history."

'Sorry but my disposable income is tied up in a roast in the oven.'

BRINGGGG!, 'I TOLD you to turn off your cell phone!'

"Hello? is it me you're looking for?"

'He's busy right now but if it's important I'll wake him.'

Thank you for holding...

"Anderson, Anderson and Andersons - Stephens speaking."

'When I texted you all regarding the manner in which he died, I was disappointed by how many of you responded with 'lol'.'

'You're a telemarketer? Good. I've always wanted to telemarketer off!'

"If it's important they'll call back."

'Betty? I can't come over; I've got prickly heat rash again.'

"Must you look at your phone when I'm talking to you?"

The Fürther Adventures of the Phone Führer

"Yes, I’m the person who makes all the long-distance decisions… Are you the person I’m about to hang up on?"

'Call back some other time. I'm awfully busy ignoring you.'

Man answers phone in middle of the night annoying his wife.

Soothing music whilst waiting for phone line - for Vivaldi press 1.....

'I've got to hang up now, There's someone at the door.'

Smartphone Abuse

I can't believe it's come to his. I'll be glad to give you candy when you're off your cell phone.

A recent study found frequent use of cell phones can present a serious health risk to the incredibly inconsiderate.

'Here's my number. Have the gentleman call me when he wishes to order.'

"How do I get an outside line?"

'I put the king on hold while taking someone else's cellphone call.'

"I need to take this call outside."

"I know you're new here, but the next time you send the boss a text, don't start it with 'OMG'!"