Phone Call Prankster Pillows

'Rudyard here,,,I've always wanted to say that - this is Bob,,,No, not Bob Kipling,'

Sorry Alvin Feister...Has gone to meet his maker - please try again later.

"I don't mind the obscene phone calls. But I object to them reversing the charges."

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Bo're'droom

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

Here and There Trays

"No training period, but you can purchase my instructional video on line for $49.95."

"Welcome aboard, Bailey. Don't worry — they don't bite."

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

'Germaine, what did you do with my desk?'

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"Honey! Where are my lucky Incredible Hulk board meeting socks?!?"

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

'So what do you think of my report, sir?'

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

'Did you just show your teeth at me Wilson?'

What do you mean, "Did I try anything funny?"

"Wilson, I built this company from scratch!"

'Everyone in the company wears one, Yomp! It's what keeps us focused!'

"Everybody gets a raise."

'Here comes the boss. Quick, look busy!'

"That's a Hula Hoop. I asked you to find a loophole."

Receptionist covers for boss by saying he's out of the office.

"Might you explain to me how your division managed to spend twenty-six thousand dollars on tennis balls?"

"Manhatten Brooklyn Hoboken Long Island"

'Cancel his redundancy cheque then phone for an ambulance'

"Are you sure you want to present your ideas in the form of an airplane?"

'Mr. Coleman is on vacation. Would you care to hold?'

'It was going well - until his power suit short-circuited.'

'The boss says you can come in from the naughty step now.'

'I'm sorry, Henderson - But profits are down and we have to make sacrifices.'

Man needs to buy excuse for missing work from vending machine.