Philosophy Lecturers Gifts

Vote Centrist to Keep Things Exactly as Awful as They Are

Thinking Gears

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

Humans...What is their purpose?

5pm Happy Hour. 6pm discussion: what is true happiness?

"Je suis Descartes, donc, je pense."

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

"Dad, please tell me again about that mass production and consumerism."

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'The Questioner'

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

"Hey, I'm just playing devil's avocado!"

'The meaning of life is dog food.'

Pastorius wonders why.

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

Zenemies.

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"When I get to Heaven, will I still have to clean my room?"

"...I don't believe in the past or the future. I don't even believe in right now. Everyone remembers the past differently. Everyone imagines the future differently. Everyone even disagrees about what's happening right now. So who's to say tomorrow what you and I did tonight?"

'I need to borrow your Ph.D. for a half hour tomorrow. I have a major problem to solve.'

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

Arthur Schopenhauer

'There is no past. No future. Only the present, which is changing every instant. Time is merely an illusion. Got it?'

"If the stars should appear one night in a thousand years, how would men believe and adore, and preserve for many generations the remembrance of the city of God which had been shown! … Emerson" "Good boy!"

How world war III started.

'Oh-oh -- What hath He wrought now?'

"What's so wrong with always living in the present?"

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

"Well, I think we come back as newspapers." "You're nuts."