Philosophy Enthusiasts Gifts

'These are fine, but what's in it for me?'

'Pardon, Monsieur. What is time, please?' Man replies: 'Time is the non-spatial continuum in which events occur in irreversible succession from the past to the future.'

'You look like you have a lot on your mind, Jim!'

Zebra Crossing

'Do not look within. Trust me, you don't want to know what's in there.'

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."

Expect the Unexpected. If you think about hat for a while, you can get really confused!

"Just think of it, Charles – yesterday I was a caterpillar, and tomorrow I'll be dead."

'Sorry, I'm travel and weather; philosophy's over there...'

'You know, he's got a point -- if we're so smart, why ain't we rich?'

'That's it? Listen to my mom?'

"Are you sure that was Buddha? -- It sounds more like something Vladimir Putin would say."

"Oh, no. Dude, are WE the bad guys?"

"I don't want to let being dead define me."

Validation of Parking/Belief Systems

"As for the meaning of life, it doesn't have to suck."

'I need a statement that I've been here for the past 15 minutes and read David Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding.'

Author of thought for the day on commitment remains anonymous.

Nun doing the vacuuming, "It's a spiritual vacuum."

'No, I don't believe in life after birth. When you're born, you're born!'

'Sigh ... there's nothing good on in my brain again. Guess I'll just go to bed.'

Unbeknown to other, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

Existentialists In Love

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

'I'm afraid, my son, that the meaning of life is politics as usual.'

Socrates, 399 B.C: 'Wow, I could have had a V-8.'

'Technically, shouldn't EVERYBODY have survivor's guilt?'

"Professor Williams had at first been reluctant to join the Assistant Deans in their Think Great Thoughts aerobics. He later came to enjoy the activity."

'And the life of man, solitary, poore, nasty, brutish, and short.' -- Thomas Hobbes, 'I dated a guy like that once.'

'Still clinging to life?'

"Wake up, Tom. You're having the American dream again."

"Victim was walking home from a philosophy class. Shot twice and presumably fell, though, without witnesses, we don't know if he made a noise."

"I'm trying to live each day like it was my last!"

"You'll find it's a whole new lifestyle, without actually being a life."

"Lust and gluttony are so 20th century. Let's give people entitlement and see what happens."