Philosophical Couch Dwellers Gifts

Whoa. I just had a near-life experience.

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

Studies show foods work miracles!

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Big screen TV.

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'.

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

"And next up, Fairy Tales: FolkLORE or FolkLIES!"

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

"Stand up, honey. The president's on. You're committing treason."

"I won't be in today, I'm feeling a little under the coffee table."

"You're overthinking it. Sometimes a belly rub is just a belly rub."

"Well, he looks alive as of 10 minutes ago, but the stream is frozen."

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

Psychiatrist with bust of Freud

"So that's where you were last night."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

How to be a Dynamic Over-achiever

'As your financial advisor, I'd have to advise you to change your main income provider,'

"It all started when I didn't grow up in a palatial estate."

"I'm an agnostic now that I've started having self doubts."

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

Axel, I notice you read a lot of highbrow books

The big questions in life.

"I have this relationship with money, it's complicated."

All kidding aside, let me explain why I get to call you Al, yet you have to call me Dr. Kapuchnik. It's simply because I'm a psychiatrist and you're a bum. It's nothing personal. Thanks for explaining. I feel better.

"When I grow up, I want to impeach a president."

"Well, it's another brand-new day. What do you say to getting up and looking the damn thing straight in the eye?"

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

'Your dilemma is fabulous. Imagine what a dramaturge could do with it.'