Philosophical Couch Dwellers T-Shirts

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

Studies show foods work miracles!

'I wasted half my life perched on top of a mountain in the Himalayas. Only to discover that the true meaning of life was a night in watching the box, with a few cans of lager.'

Big screen TV.

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

'Mr. Dunbarter, your fantasy that 'greed is good' may be a case of economic insanity.'

Women in bed with her husband reads a book titled 'Sex Stinks'.

"Stand up, honey. The president's on. You're committing treason."

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

"And next up, Fairy Tales: FolkLORE or FolkLIES!"

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

"I won't be in today, I'm feeling a little under the coffee table."

"You're overthinking it. Sometimes a belly rub is just a belly rub."

"Well, he looks alive as of 10 minutes ago, but the stream is frozen."

"Tell me why you think people are out to get you."

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

Psychiatrist with bust of Freud

"So that's where you were last night."

"Scientists confirmed today that everything we know about the structure of the universe is wrongedy-wrong-wrong."

How to be a Dynamic Over-achiever

"It all started when I didn't grow up in a palatial estate."

'As your financial advisor, I'd have to advise you to change your main income provider,'

"I'm an agnostic now that I've started having self doubts."

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

'Your dilemma is fabulous. Imagine what a dramaturge could do with it.'

"I suppose we could burst onto the literary scene."

'You cant do anything these days without someone suspecting your motives. . . there is only one way out. . . inaction.'

"You just said, ‘And then I killed my first and second husbands.’ ... Let's explore that."

"Well, it's another brand-new day. What do you say to getting up and looking the damn thing straight in the eye?"

"When I grow up, I want to impeach a president."