Philosopher Of Youth Gifts

Axel, would you ever make a deal with the forces of darkness in which you remain forever young while your portrait shows the signs of aging? Fortunately for me, eternal youth is already covered by the fact that I'm a comic strip character.

"I don't know...but it seems like nothing ever changes around here. It's like we've been 15 years old forever!"

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"I'll bet all of Albert Einstein's teachers felt like idiots for giving him bad grades too."

"Could I ask just one question?"

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

Multi-Generational Books

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

Philosopher trading cards.

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

'All dogs have 4 legs. Tabby has 4 legs. But I'm just a kid, so I don't have to think logically.'

Sex Education

Young Galileo

"Why did God make fruit if he also made candy?"

'He's into Proust as only a child can be.'

"It's one thing for the National Commission to comment on the quality of teaching in our schools. It's another thing entirely for you to stand up and call Mr. Costello a yo-yo."

'Grownups are stupid! How can you be good and have fun?'

The end of innocence

"Times were hard for old Sid....He had to get a part-time job!"

"I like to consider Third Grade as just another life hack."