Teen Philosopher Gifts

'You mean if I want extra money I have to go to work? That's your job, dad.'

"I'm proud of you...you're reaching that age where you're thinking about the future...you're making decisions about your life, what you want to do, what you want to be..."

"IRL sucks."

"I did a lot of thinking in study hall today."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"I still haven't decided if I want to be unemployed as an English major or as a Communications major."

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"Could I ask just one question?"

"One year closer to college!"

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

Playdough's The Republic

'This test doesn't understand me.'

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

I think I can, I think I can ... therefore I think I am...

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

'How much stuff can I get away with and still go to heaven?'

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

'I've been coming to Kindergarten every day for two weeks!-- When do I get paid?'

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

Philosopher trading cards.

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"

'A 'D' in physics and biology, an 'A' in reading aloud. What will ever become of this kid?'

A young positivist.

"I'm not going to lie. It took a large speaker's fee to get me to say your future is bright."

'Young lady, I'm afraid existential despair is no excuse for not eating your lima beans.'

"Daddy, instead of the princess story tonight, can you explain how and why manifest destiny eliminated the American Indians?"

Life after death

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"