Pet Allergy Warriors Pillows

"You can domesticate it, but only if it's hypoallergenic."

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

Allergy Information: May contain traces of nuts, soya, child bones.

Antihistamine Rally At National Sinus Cavity

"Is it just me, or is the pollen particularly bad this year?"

"I can't have anything that's a food."

"How many more times, you've got hayfever, so no, you can't have any cannabis oil."

'Oh yeah, ths boss is going to love the new hire.'

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

"How adorable! I'd love to have one of my own but I'm so terribly allergic."

Man sneezes and blows flowers out of painting.

'You see, I'm allergic to dog dander....'

Protecting Nature

"Aaaaa....Chooo!"

"Everything on the menu can be prepared with no gluten, standard gluten, or extra gluten."

'It's a great, safe neighbourhood: The owner of the house is allergic to cats...'

"The tests came back positive. You're H2O intolerant."

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

"He's allergic to peanuts, sensitive to wheat, lactose-intolerant, and just plain weirded out by fruit."

"It might taste a little different. It's gluten-free slop."

"Yeah, it's a drag, but the only flight I could get was a red-eye."

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

The Inverted Nose: Genetic engineering's answer to the sniffles.

"None of our items are gluten-free, but they are prepared by people who are."

'If that's true, if you've really done it, I can say unequivocally, that is indeed...Nothing to sneeze at!'

'Unfortunately, Mr.Beckons, your son Dean is very allergic to grass. . .'

"The gluten's back. And it's pissed."

"Y' know, a GOOD host would provide a lactose-free option!"

Asthma cats

'Look - there's the first swallow of summer.'

"Dad's allergies kicked in during out special 'man to man' walk...so I learned all about the birds and the sneeze."

'I have allergies, so before I can eat you, I need to know if you contain traces of nuts...'

"It's gluten/carb/fat/preservative/sugar-free. Enjoy your Celery Supreme."

"Well, my wife is lactose-maltose-dextrose-sucrose-cellulose intolerant, which means I can't even hand her an empty box of candy."

Frank and Ernest's tips for travelers. When traveling makes you congested ... call rheum service. Sniff.