Pescatarian Satirist Gifts

'Gimme your wallet! I've got a salmon, and it's farmed'

Chicken soup for the sole.

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

"Don't worry about it now, but I'll need that hook back when you're done."

"Yes, we're stranded here... but think how healthier we are eating nothing but fish!"

'Oh, come on - If you're gonna mess up my castle, take the whole thing.'

Pirates at the mall.

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

Edna, I fear our love doesn't have a future... My parents would eat you!

'You said I should check back with you if I didn't get any better. . .'

'Bad news! More people are switching from red meat to fish!'

'Celeb Foods: Damien Hurst's voles in brine.'

'Crabs, sharks, octopi...'

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'

"It was a lovely holiday. The chips crispy and delicious, the ice cream cornets were to die for, the only downside being, the hostility of the humans, who were reluctant to share their sustenance."

"Riddle your salad with pepper, sir?"

'For obvious reasons the chowder's made with chicken and pork.'

'After paying for the boat, it's insurance, the docking and gas, I couldn't afford a trailer.'

"There's nothing wrong with the ship. We just got a better offer."

"I don't think he's wearing that snorkel because he wants to swim with us. Especially, since it's lunch time."

"May I be candid, Hogarth? I should have thought a shrimp girl would make a more appropriate subject than a girl shrimp."

"Objection, your Honor! This is clearly an immaterial witness!"

'These f****** pop stars are setting really f****** bad examples with their b***** lifestyles.'

'I am wearing my bikini!'

'This is totally bananas!'

Fisherman catches a mine.

'That's what I call riding the barrel!'

Cocaine discovered in British marine life. . . Shrimp Coketail

"Simply put, our 'Nostalgia Special' is the 'Catch' of yesterday."

Another Disappointment for Captain Ahab

Celebrity X-factor Gogglebox Bake-off on Ice

Full use should be made of sea objects put there for your convenience.

The Domestic Violence Workshop Commences At 2:30.

'No swordfish were harmed in the catching of our tuna, and no tuna were harmed in the catching of our swordfish.'