Peel Philosopher Gifts

"Remember, you're only as old as your peel."

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

Eagle (The Divine Comedy).

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

Passed over at the Inaugural Poetry Audition

"A watched kettle never boils, so I'm covering up Alexa."

Today's alpha-lesson is "Keep a journal." The average person lets life pass them by. The events of their lives fade into nothingness. An alpha knows that long after they're gone, their thoughts and experiences will be of great interest to historians. That's not an original thought. I read it in the papyrus Randus Maximus XIV left in a safe deposit box after he helped conquer Judea.

Grass: We lost some good men today!

"Upon further review, the receiver did not establish a meaningful and personal relationship with the football, therefore it is ruled an incomplete pass."

"I haven't been in a playpen yet that could hold me."

My definition of 'quality time?'...charging $500 per hour.

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

Dept. de Philosophie

'Is he taking the piss?'

'I'd like to participate in gym class, but I'm afraid I'll get overheated and contribute to the global warming problem.'

"Does school really help people with real life?"

"I feel like a hallow shell of my former self."

'I hear your fees are very reasonable.'

U. S. POST OFFICE, ''Fragile'? Yeah, yeah, pal -- they're all fragile.'

"And the Haves, you might say, are divided into the Gives and Give Nots."

'No, we can never actually see the big cartoonist, but he's everywhere.'

"Wood-oven-toasted rosemary focaccia or traditional baguette?"

"You can't compete with a retired pharmacist."

Life isn't just black and white.

But if you make his pearls for him, he'll never learn to make them himself.

Poet and Peasant

'...and so I say without fear of contradiction...'

No caption. (Turtle uses its shell as an umbrella.)

"Should I throw this old draft away, or will my future archivists find it an invaluable source of insight into my psyche?"

'I didn't feel answers were necessary. All the questions seemed rhetorical.'

"Venal, narcissistic, power hungry politicians. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em."

"Sometimes in my life I feel it's time for a change."

'In what context do you mean 'Are you done?''

'Deposit $1.00 - This is your final notice before we send it to a collection agency.'

Attorney basic fees.