Paw-sychic Gifts

'He can't speak to the dead, but he can speak to the dead.'

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

'That was fun!'

Dog fetching clown shoes.

"Humans are strange."

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

Becoming The Good Boy They Say You Are

Paw readings

"Take a right at Rocky's fire hydrant. A left at Duke's bench and the dog part will be one block past buddy's tree."

"It's nice to be wanted."

"I can't stop licking my boo-boo."

'Actually, mine is a useless hunter, but we both love wandering idly in the woods...'

'Wait a minute - isn't this one yours and that one mine?'

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

I hate to be the one to tell you this, but the leash isn't to protect you from dog-nappers.

'I'm afraid we already have a St. Bernard up here.'

'Oh, yes, you will get off!'

"I'm trying to end my bone addiction."

Dog on couch at psychiatrist office talking about love and liver snacks

'Let's see those smiles.'

"I wonder if the dumb obedience school gives a warranty..."

"You've done it, Martin - you've taught him to smile!"

Hang Time Fido

"Oh no, Mother. The dog is curled up asleep."

Heel! Toe!

"I say you're spoiling that dog."

If they were cats

I'm interviewing for a new walker.

'Let's switch sides. My feet are killing me.'

'No problem...'

Barking Today - 'I always bark for no reason whatever.'

"He's a real dog person."

'No doubt about it. We've got to get cell phones!'

'One last question... Dog person or cat person?'

"Do those shoes taste funny to you?"