Patty Pranksters Pillows

'Our chicken patties are beef and pork.'

Night of the Latkes

Retirement homes' 'pill fight'.

MacGyver's Cat: 'You see, I took your bed and two paper clips and made it my bed.'

"Anachronism or not, it just ain't the fourth without the ribs and Willie Nelson."

'It's called 'cause and effect.' I pound this log and Tarzan goes bananas.'

'Big sale at the Dog Store. Buy 1, get 2 free.'

'But he qualifies for medicare in dog years.'

"Hello, Pine Grove Elementary? Could you tell Miss Pritchard to come to Lakeview Veterinarian Clinic right away?"

"Hello? Guys? Okay, I've had a long day and I'm very tired, so no pranks this time. I'm serious... guys?!"

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

"I always get the 'Good Boy.' How about the 'Bad Dog' for a change?"

Under New Management. Actually, Betsy, we were hoping for a flag with a little more style.

Uncle Donnie

'I've only come to get my nail back.'

'I don't think Marmaduke has ever seen a vegetarian before.'

"We've invented a new word!"

'He ate all the magnets off of the refrigerator.'

ABC Diapers. Comfy Tushy Diapers. Now 3 times more absorbent! Note to self: Drink 4 times more juice.

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'Well you asked for Al dente.'

-'Okay Rebel, find the drugs.' -'Are you kidding? There's dirty underwear here!'

'I taught him to shake hands, but I don't know where he got the joybuzzer!'

Tartar sauce.

'Oh, the usual, a postman, a couple of salesmen, a pizza delivery boy, how was your day?'

Someone's going to have to tell him he's adopted...

"Not that it's right, but I understand. I was young once and used to sneak out to do crop circle, too."

"That damn dog's scratching again!"

'Looks like someone got their bags mixed up at daycare drop-off.'

Monkey dropping apples on Newton's head.

'Let's just keep quiet about this, and maybe some terrorist group will claim credit.'

"You're making a complete ass of yourself, Rodney!"

"It was trick to assemble, as my lab assistant kept taking bones and burying them outside."

Self-walking dog