Pasture Playwright Gifts

'Guess who!'

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'Yak, yak, yak.'

'He's the best bull I've ever had.'

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

Cow Pollen

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

'Good work Jenkins Whisting the National anthem Genius'

'Lord, we thank thee for the bounty we're about to receive.'

Ham-Dram

WHOA! Another 6! Erm...what's that mean?

It MUST be Valentines Day!

'Aside from a crazed sheep now and then, this is a very risk-free profession.'

'What can I say? I'm a grass magnet!'

Down On the Farm

Shepherd

"Would you look at that! Timmy was overwhelmed at the thought of his first shearing, but now, he can't stop talking to his friends about it. . ."

Impressive! (Cow has stinky smoke signals).

COW. JUST COW.

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

Even cows get the blahs....

"I've never trusted cows."

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

Sheep

Green Pieces Four Leaf Clover

"Your grass looks great."

"Free-range chicken meets grass-fed cow..."

Brown cow

'Don't leave me hanging!'

"Dear, I'd like you to meet the Holsteins."

Bloomin' moths!

"Yes, the grass is greener on the other side, but significantly sparser too, so it's a toss-up really...."

Will work for grass

"I've given up on trying to improve the quality of my milk: It just ends up mixed with milk from other cows in a big vat..."

Erm...what the hell is cud, anyway?