Pasture Comedians Gifts

'Don't leave me hanging!'

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

Motorherd

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

"Kind words help the dairy cow produce good milk. They go in one ear and out the udder."

Cow Pollen

Cow in a vest: Well, I think I look like Bruce Willis!

'Ok, this sty is great and all, but can we get some huge explosions? Wilbur, could you say 'it's about to get real'?'

Shocking cows and chickens with the ingredients of the cake.

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

"I call it 'Moona Lisa'."

Ham-Dram

It MUST be Valentines Day!

'What can I say? I'm a grass magnet!'

'Aside from a crazed sheep now and then, this is a very risk-free profession.'

Down On the Farm

"I get aroused when I see you in leather."

"Would you look at that! Timmy was overwhelmed at the thought of his first shearing, but now, he can't stop talking to his friends about it. . ."

Shepherd

'Mr. President, you have a phone call. It's the First Hen.'

Tropical Cow Tank

A centi-stampede.

'Bad news is Tim Turkey is dead, the good news is I've made a wish!'

'My wife, my rancher, his artificial insemination device!'

Even cows get the blahs....

Cow wash: 'You missed a spot.'

"I've never trusted cows."

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message after the peep.'

"Don't be alarmed, Lois, but there appears to be a pop-up thermometer protruding from your right buttock."

"Free-range chicken meets grass-fed cow..."

'Let's see... two clucks, three baas, one quack, two oinks, and eight neighs- once again, the neighs have it.'

Cow Fishing on the mighty tundra.

This one needs re-booting!