Paradise Ponderer Gifts

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"I know this is heaven! This is the lightest I've ever been"

'We'd like you to pave paradise and put up a parking lot.'

Sign in Heaven: BEWARE OF NOTHING

This is a Health & Safety Free Zone

"Wow! I guess you CAN 'take it with you', after all!"

'You can take that off now.'

'...Well if this is heaven, why aren't you using a Mac?'

Man sees CCTV camera at gates to heaven

'Mrs Eve, Mr Adam, you can forget about the lawsuit. It might have been a bit over the top to get kicked out of paradise because of a lousy apple, but you didn't even have a lease!'

'This is awkward.'

Heaven - emergency exit.

'It's been determined that we're un-constitutionally over capacity.'

'See you in court.'

'What have you done with your life.'

Castaway Island

'Well, Mr. Hefner. Here we are. Hope you're not disappointed.'

Eric suspected it was going to be another quiet day at work.

'I'm new up here...where are the men?'

Welcome to Heaven - For a Limited Period Only

"Yup, we use atheists for room service..."

"Not only are we new here, I understand the whole place didn't exist a few days ago."

"I think I was happier when I was miserable."

"I imagine you're keen to catch up with your late husband."

'My family thinks I'm up here watching over them.'

'D'you know what I miss most?...Funerals.'

'Ferguson always was an overachiever.'

This place already got on my nerves...

"I don't get it...He's dead!"

Welcome To forever And Everland

'Divorce... what the hell does this mean?'

Hugh Hefner Goes to Heaven.

'I didn't expect to have remote controls here.'

"I've got some good news, you've been upgraded!"

"Ignore him, it's just Columbus discovering another cloud."