Panic Enthusiast Gifts

"What we didn't have but obviously needed was an alarmist."

Panic Button

"It's almost flu season! Stay indoors! Touch no one!"

"For God's sake, man, just tell me what we're running from!"

Professor Yomp inserts ecology into his economic formula: "We're doomed!"

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

Paranormal A-Z...

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

'We need you to settle a bet -- was 'Twilight Zone' a sitcom or a documentary?'

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

New Road Signs to Watch For:

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

Astral Projection

"Let's hear some of that scout master wisdom now, sir!"

'So, what's for dinner ...a séance?'

"Had more ghost-hunters 'round my place last night....scared the daylights outta me!"

'Halloween is just around the corner, kids. Have you decided what are you going to wear?'

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

He snuck in on me again, didn't he.

"Get a tomb!"

'Waiter, there's a Fly-Agaric in my soup.'

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

"Which one is yours?"

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

The End is Nigh

Polterguest: "When is your brother going to leave? He's driving me crazy!"

'Harry! - If you can hear me - what did you do with the remote!?'

Fear of Flying Seminar

'I really got to stop watching paranormal movies before bed!'

"Your husband says BOO!"

'Under new business, is anyone wearing a wire?'