Pan Protection Squad Gifts

Interrogating a foodie

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

Deforestation.

North Pole

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

Nature versus commerce.

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

Natural Disasters

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

Eco-Anxiety For All Seasons

'Humans & Lemmings have a lot in comon...'

Child protects planet with umbrella.

It beached on a pile of plastic bottles, so they were able to just roll it back out.

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"Good riddance! They were messing up the environment."

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

Just Stop Boil

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

'Well, kids, it all started with a massive Federal program to combat global warming....'

Bottle Bank: For the Colour Blind.

No pollution! It's a good day to get my eco-nut sister's present. What is it? Something she's agitated for all year. Where are we going? Here's good. She's so lucky. Not everyone gets fresh air for Christmas!

Climate Crisis

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

'And this one's framed in beautiful Brazilian hardwood.'

Global Warmer 2000.

'I must be reaching that age! I can't get my ozone layer up anymore!'

Insect extinction

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

'Did you just hear that? We are now and endangered species and mating is now our top priority!'

"For goodness sake, not again, it's day-time but we can't see the sky: It must be another oil spill..."