Paint Schemer Gifts

Ceiling Paint

"Well, I finally figured out why we were going to the vet so often for check ups! He finally plucked up the courage to ask her out!"

'The kids just love doing paint by numbers.'

"My assistant is more of a behind-the-scenes kind of guy."

"I'm in big trouble. The dog ate my homework, and Dad ate my science project."

"It's a setup."

"Harold finds painting very therapeutic."

Jackson Pollock's early paint-by-numbers period.

'I don't see how this roller thing helps. . .'

'I'm getting ready for mating season.'

Old man stealing sand from a sand box for child

Paint by numbers stained glass windows

Valentine Comix

Boy standing on 'The Joy of Sex' book.

"May I have your attention? For Christmas, all I want is for everyone to write a note on how smart, charming and social I am. I'm collecting college reference letters before I enter my terrible teens."

Agent with security case proposes to girlfriend with ring that has a tiny security case chained to it.

Paint charming.

Robert Macaire as a Matrimonial Agent

"I was thinking more of a leap-year wedding."

Spray painter.

Fake it with Flowers.

'Er . . . wouldn't it be simpler to have your glasses tinted, dear?'

"If I do that to my own Barbie, imagine what might happen to a tattle-tale."

The Groundhog didn't see his shadow...because the superdome lights were out.

Paint by Numbers.

"Before I say yes, my dad, who is a notary, wants to ask you about your plans for our future."

"I ask for nothing but your company."

"Now, do you see why I discourage employee fraternization, Tom!"

"Our plan for world domination starts with the chew toys."

"I told him not to get side-tracked in Accounting, but would he listen?"

'Oh no! It's you again, madam!'

Art Exhibit - show my parents the art degree wasn't a waste.

'Now THAT's what I call an innovative business plan!'

'Your teacher called and said the school concert tickets you sold me for $20 were free.'