Outdoorsman Gifts

"Take my hand, my love, and come with me to the cabin, where we can explore each other's naked bodies for ticks."

"Good shootin', son. I'm pretty sure that was a squirrel."

'That's one heck of a recoil, Bob!'

'Why not start with catching something easy... like a cold?'

Holy cow! This is nothing like the hunting video game we played!

'You feel awkward? You're the one who said we ought to hunt bare.'

'Be right back, Bob... I need to visit the other tree!'

'Check it out, Ted... Dinner AND dessert!'

'Great job! ? take the rest of the day off!'

'I don't know, Al... A dumpster in the middle of the woods! Seems kind of fishy to me.'

I can hear growling, but I can't see the bear.

'Call me crazy, Earl, but I get the feeling those ducks were expecting us!'

"Any duck that thinks that decoy looks like a duck,swims like a duck and sounds like a duck, deserves to be shot!"

"Up here! Beef jerky, trail mix, energy bars!"

Spring turkey season has Pete super paranoid...

"Somehow, this just don't seem sportin', Jake."

'I'm a hunter with gatherer tendencies...'

Spiro & Pusho cook a chicken on a volcano

'Look, you hunt deer your way and I'll hunt them my way.'

'Blah! You have duck breath!'

'Ed missed a nice trout in that hole last week. He takes everything personally.'

The Easter Bunny hits a hunter with his eggs and makes his escape.

'We're going into cold water and HE'S drinking the hot chocolate!'

"A strange thing. When I bagged him, he had this roll of toilet tissue in his paw."

'I bought the plaque before leaving on my hunting trip... Needless to say, I was hoping for a better outcome.'

The camouflage skills Norman had practised in the living room were to prove ineffective in the wild.

"The trick is to always carry some ground pepper and throw it behind you to stop the bloodhounds from following your scent. . ."

'I'm sure looking forward to this mountain goat hunt. How about you, Ben?'

While hunting, Brad finds bear signs. (hunter in woods looking at toilet paper roll on a branch)

'Bear tracks... and they're fresh!'

Paddling upstream to save a $1.79 lure snagged on a log.

"I'm almost positive that there is a knife blade on this thing somewhere."

Squirrel chopping wooden leg of lumberjack.

'Check it out, Walter... hunter-on-a-stick!'

"Fred, I said: 'start a small fire to cook breakfast.'"