Rugged Outdoorsman Gifts

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: The Deer Hunter?

"This'll keep the family fed for weeks."

"I do miss trees but I don't miss the raking."

"Um, Larry? That’s not a quail."

Fred's Canadian caribou hunt goes from bad to worse.

'Ed missed a nice trout in that hole last week. He takes everything personally.'

"It's God's country, if your god wears camouflage and dips tobacco."

"C’mon, boy. Give it up."

'This duck call works too well.'

'You know, after a long hard winter, I just HATE eating out of cans.'

"Obviously, I can't fly like you, but if you teach me, I can probably sing like you..."

Your five o'clock shadow is showing, Mike.

Paddling upstream to save a $1.79 lure snagged on a log.

A man fly fishing forms a fish with his line.

"Take my hand, my love, and come with me to the cabin, where we can explore each other's naked bodies for ticks."

'That's one heck of a recoil, Bob!'

I can hear growling, but I can't see the bear.

"....Reception on my tablet is so much better since I added wifi to my mule..."

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

Ducks look alarmed at 'No Swimming' sign.

"I'm gonna want that taxidermied."

While hunting, Brad finds bear signs. (hunter in woods looking at toilet paper roll on a branch)

"Any duck that thinks that decoy looks like a duck,swims like a duck and sounds like a duck, deserves to be shot!"

'If a bear attacks and I have to play dead I want it to be as convincing as possible!'

'I'm a hunter with gatherer tendencies...'

Miniature Trailer on Desert Island

Leaf blowers at dawn.

Squirrel chopping wooden leg of lumberjack.

"You'll grow in time my boy. Until then you'll just have to be a 'little' patient!"

"I'm almost positive that there is a knife blade on this thing somewhere."

'I fell out of my treestand but fortunately nothing got hurt.'

'You feel awkward? You're the one who said we ought to hunt bare.'

Spiro & Pusho cook a chicken on a volcano

"So there's my rifle!"

I just bought a new Kindle Voyage. It's much better than my Kindle Paperwhite. Blasphemy, little buddy. A real man lugs around a paperback that he's milled from a fallen Redwood that he lifted off of a baby deer, before reuniting the fawn with its mother. I bought if off of Amazon. I didn't even use "one-click." I used the shopping cart and chose all the options manually. Almost as impressive. I keep it old-school.