Oral Hygiene Fanatic Gifts

Closing Laugh Dentist: Closed at 1, Open Wide at 2.

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

Dentist's Office: 'I know that $3,280 hurt you more than it did me, Dad.'

"My husband Frank still has all his own teeth...he keeps them in that jar over the fireplace!"

Floss Street Vendor

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

Things you forgot to tell me about getting older: "You're going to need bigger tooth floss."

'I don't like the mediciney taste of this mouthwash either. I hate that taste of eyes of newt and turtle brains first thing in the morning.'

The inscription says: 'Whiter teeth; fresher breath.'

'You're not supposed to use 'dental floss' on dentures!'

"Ooh, you’ve got a little piece of retiree caught in your teeth."

'I still have all my own teeth.'

'Mind that molar, careful of that canine...'

'Most of the dental floss gets thrown out on used. No wonder I'm always broke.'

Grassy breath?

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

'You should have come to me sooner.'

Three little pig's wolf has bad breath

Toothbrush Superhero.

'I used some of that stripy toothpaste. Now I have striped teeth!'

"So, you see, what you were really looking for was a deeper connection with your father, and not the dentist's office down the hall."

"If you won't brush or floss could you at least run your tongue over your teeth once in a while?"

Dentist as Sherlock Holmes investigating a patient's mouth

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

"Thanks, Doc- you've put me back in business."

"Don't get too excited. Getting a filling does not make you a cyborg."

'I know! He has the worst breath!'

The Tooth Fairy on Vacation. Museum of Natural History.

A vampire lays in his coffin and he has put his vampire dentures in a glass beside the coffin.

'You need to chuck more wood.'

"Trust me, the best beauty tip is to get a good toothpaste and brush your teeth twice a day: it will keep you looking young. . ."

Castaway with popcorn holds up sign: 'SEND DENTAL FLOSS'.

"Charles, you have some corn stuck in your teeth."

'-and who's next?'