Oral Hygiene Fanatic Pillows

Closing Laugh Dentist: Closed at 1, Open Wide at 2.

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

Dentist's Office: 'I know that $3,280 hurt you more than it did me, Dad.'

"My husband Frank still has all his own teeth...he keeps them in that jar over the fireplace!"

Floss Street Vendor

The inscription says: 'Whiter teeth; fresher breath.'

Things you forgot to tell me about getting older: "You're going to need bigger tooth floss."

"Ooh, you’ve got a little piece of retiree caught in your teeth."

'...your teeth are putting on weight.'

'You're not supposed to use 'dental floss' on dentures!'

'I don't like the mediciney taste of this mouthwash either. I hate that taste of eyes of newt and turtle brains first thing in the morning.'

'I still have all my own teeth.'

'Mind that molar, careful of that canine...'

Grassy breath?

'Most of the dental floss gets thrown out on used. No wonder I'm always broke.'

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

'You should have come to me sooner.'

Three little pig's wolf has bad breath

Dentist as Sherlock Holmes investigating a patient's mouth

"Trust me, the best beauty tip is to get a good toothpaste and brush your teeth twice a day: it will keep you looking young. . ."

A vampire lays in his coffin and he has put his vampire dentures in a glass beside the coffin.

Toothbrush Superhero.

'You need to chuck more wood.'

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

"Thanks, Doc- you've put me back in business."

"Don't get too excited. Getting a filling does not make you a cyborg."

'I know! He has the worst breath!'

'I used some of that stripy toothpaste. Now I have striped teeth!'

"If you won't brush or floss could you at least run your tongue over your teeth once in a while?"

"So, you see, what you were really looking for was a deeper connection with your father, and not the dentist's office down the hall."

Castaway with popcorn holds up sign: 'SEND DENTAL FLOSS'.

A hasty waste or tasty paste.

'After scraping my tongue, flossing my teeth, brushing my teeth, whitening my teeth and gargling, I'm hungry all over again!'