Operating Room Jokester Gifts

'Maybe it is psychosomatic.'

"Sorry, that's not my table."

"Damn it, nurse! I didn't ask for a twenty. I asked for a ten and two fives."

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'

'These computer repair people certainly take their jobs seriously.'

"I give up. Where's the patient?'

'You'll be awake during the entire procedure...but no peeking!'

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

'Pardon me, Doctor; but exactly where did you study anaesthesiology?'

"If this isn't successful, the next one is on us."

"I think you may have your gown on back to front."

"Let's just start cutting and see what happens."

'It's always about you isn't it, George? Wouldn't you like to hear about the terrible day I've had for a change?'

"Fortunately, we have an excellent selection!"

'Say, please.'

'I've had so many transplants, I feel like a garden nursery.'

"Uh, try unplugging him, then plugging him back in."

'My patient needs a new kidney. Make any grave mistakes today?'

"...and how about you, Wellington? Does this smell funny to you?"

Surgeon Finds Heart Reading 'Be my Valentine'.

'Sure your attorney can be in the operating room, during you surgery, but we'll have to give him anesthesia too.'

Nurse cautioning a patient

Plastic Surgery

"Open mike night"

Doctor: 'Mind if I cut in?'

'Doctor, I don't think the five-second rule applies to transplant organs.'

"I can catch-you can't throw."

'You're wrong...this is brain surgery.'

The Grim Reaper as a surgical assistant.

"He did it again. Slipped out and replaced himself with a bunch of lumpy pillows."