Online Persona Enthusiast Pillows

"Don't judge me until you see me web page."

I need guidance. Go ahead, child. My tweets and my status updates are witty and charming, nut in person I'm boring. You seek a way to improve your personality? I seek a way to strap my phone to my mouth so it can display my tweets and status updates. Computer Villa.

"Well, if you can't accept me as I really am, have you seen my Facebook page?"

'I don't need therapy, but my alter ego on Facebook really has some issues!'

My Spam Sketchbook

"I have a personal blog, therefore I am!"

"He'd make a wonderful main character for a short story, but I wouldn't put up with him for an entire novel."

"Look on the dark side."

The reserved and the go-ers.'

Social Influencers Anonymous.

Internet Name Tags.

"Of course I'm being 'catty'."

"But sir, you may think you want underwear, but your internet consumer profile says you want a jet ski."

Likes Makes Right

Man convinced by a flattering character sketch

"Yeah, I see the outgoing calls, but what about the introverted ones?"

Internet Addict Anonymous

"Do I need to remind you that I have a huge Internet following?"

"High school uniforms?! Can you imagine everyone wearing the same thing every day!"

'These upcoming negotiations are going to be rough Jekyll, son you better send Hyde.'

"Of course I love you . . . didn't you see my Twitter feed?"

'I and my Blog'

Internet taking money from a man's pocket

Types of online-ing

'I made up my mind to spend less time on line, and I was doing real well 'til they brought the computer back from the shop.'

'He needs a domain name.'

"Okay, I'll admit it. I'm only dating you so you'll follow me on social media."

'I'm making sure my self-inflated Wikipedia entry corresponds to my self-inflated Facebook profile.'

Public Speaking Shoes

"I keep changing my profile picture."

"I'd heard you'd started a blog so I came over to cheer you up."

INSTAGRAM FEEDS MATTER

"Always standing out from the crowd."

Kids Gang.

"The corn hasn't quite matured if it's still reading Ayn Rand."