Online Identity Enthusiast Pillows

'He needs a domain name.'

'I'm a self.com-made man.'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

Likes: $2.

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

Man doing a search on a computer

'An encyclopedia? I don't know. Let's look up what it is on Wikipedia.'

'Those are my triplets. Com, Net and Org Barnes.'

"Alright. What should we watch first - the Youtube video or the comments below?"

"When Harold first said he identified as a balloon animal I thought it was just a phase, but here we are fifteen years later and it seems to be working."

'Do you have 4G up here?'

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

"Home is where the WiFi is."

"Do you have a link I can click on that removes me from all future conversations with you?"

I e-bay t-shirt.

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

>Enter new password: BEEF STEW >Password not stroganoff.

'Another big newspaper just went out of business.', 'How did you hear about that?', 'I read it on the internet.'

Scientist researching animal droppings is looking at Faeces Book on the computer.

Bill Johnson 1914-2000: Server Timed Out.

"Actually, Sally, my name isn't Mrs. Santa Claus... It's Barb. I'm not defined by my husband."

"There's corporate me and there's me, and, by God, we both know how to have fun."

"'Can correctly complete a CAPTCHA image 8 our of 10 times.' Any other skills?"

"I wish you people would just read the blog."

"No textbooks. I'm strictly Web-fed."

'Jimmy made his first blog post today.'