Curated Identity Enthusiast Pillows

"That's his online avatar...the off-line version is over here."

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

Incognito Bonito - 'I don't know me, but I do know you!'

'Squint your eyes and grit your teeth so I can make sure it's you.'

"Actually, Sally, my name isn't Mrs. Santa Claus... It's Barb. I'm not defined by my husband."

"There's corporate me and there's me, and, by God, we both know how to have fun."

Which One is Pulling Out?

What really became of the boy named Sue.

Secret Identity Theft.

Happy-Go-Lucky-Father-Of-Two-Avid-Golfer-Longtime-Magnetic-Tape-Salesman-Kiwanis-Member or Thomas Pynchon?

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

"Which one more says 'Cool Guy?'"

"I'll tell you my gender if you tell me yours."

"High school uniforms?! Can you imagine everyone wearing the same thing every day!"

"Of course I have an imaginary alter-ego. You'll find it on Facebook."

"Will you be keeping your own name or rebranding?"

"The president has banned the Mexican wave and replaced it with the American wave... Also, empanadas will now only use American jumping-beans."

'He needs a domain name.'

'... and then Peter was Mr. McGregor...'

Mr. Hillary Clinton

"Which one of us is me?"

'www.johnlint.com. Pleased to meet you.'

Frankenstein "Damn it! Not another ethic origin questionaire"

Name

"Always standing out from the crowd."

Millennial

To: Rudy Park. From: Lemont Brown. Hey Rudy, it's me. Long time no talk. How are you these days? Lemont? From Berkeley? Tap tap tap tap. Yeah. Man … Putnam Hall 1993. Those were the days. What ever happened to our roommate Ken? Tap tap tap tap tap tap. Divided Airlines. Divided Airlines. You know, that freak who was always writing articles about "news" and junk for the school paper ... That MORON who didn't know a Gameboy from a GameGear ... That big baby whose mommy was always calling to check

'We don't hire individuals here, Mr. Hovey.'

I Was Married to Banksy.

Kids Gang.

Valerie thrived in an internet community that had no idea she was a chicken...

'I'm not a hawk or a dove. I'm a dog!'

'I love how you're not like everyone else. Oh, sorry, I thought you were my wife.'

"I was born a doughboy but I identify as a crescent roll."

"At least I died British."