Personality Enthusiasts Pillows

'You have a dual-personality, sir, and I think we can use both of them.'

"Of course I'm being 'catty'."

"Yeah, I see the outgoing calls, but what about the introverted ones?"

'Look, you can only do so much!'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

Pavlov's Puppy

"I have 25 patients in my counselling group...Mrs Sherman, Mr Martin, and Mr Martins 23 other personalities."

Blok drives by New York City.

Free-Floating Anxiety

"Look out, Luke Grasswalker! Irascibility leads to the dark side of the force. . . right into a hamburger bun."

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

Pavlov's Cat

Regardless children just want to fit in.

Burning love

"He'd make a wonderful main character for a short story, but I wouldn't put up with him for an entire novel."

"My brother is always trying to one-up me. As soon as I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder he said he had tripolar disorder."

Chuck didn't care what his therapist said; that is not where he left his dummy.

Mummy Shrink.

"Right. Women adore him, men want to be like him, and YOU... well, you're hopeless. So, am I the ONLY one who sees through this guy?"

"Tom, let's explore why you feel Andrea's inability to understand 'icing the puck' is passive-aggressive."

"You have got to want to change."

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

'I blame my parents, they never set me any standards worth rebelling against.'

"Doctor, your client with the multiple personality disorder, is on lines one, two, three and four."

"You keep everything bottled up inside."

"Enough already! You’re depressing me!"

"Adolescence can be a very trying time, Mr. Alcorn."

"Do you feel you were loved as a tadpole?"

"I don't just want you to give me a raise, I want you to WANT to give me a raise."

"Living brings up a lot of issues for him."

Receptionist to patient about psychiatrist: 'Dr. Zwecklos canceled all his appointments for this week - he went off the deep end again.'

'This definitely calls for group therapy.'

Coming to a consensus.

'Do you mind if I take the rest of my session to get your input on investor psychology?'