Office Royalty Aficionado Gifts

The Man

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

'How about a game of cards?'

"He's a guard dog."

Czarcasm

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'The massive arrests have made the plans for downsizing much easier.'

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

'Scroll down for the good stuff!'

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

Trading half a kingdom for a lesser steed!

"I haven't the slightest idea who he is. He came bundled with the software."

"I don't suppose you get many sovereign rulers in here anymore?"

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

'I screwed up royally!'