Ocean Survival Gifts

Dangerous dinghy...

Cutaway view of Ocean liner.

"Whales eat billions of tiny shrimp-like creatures called krill. The krill are free but whales spend a fortune on dental floss."

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Captain in a storm

"I didn't know she could body surf. Did you know she could body surf?"

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

Thinks he's too cool for school.

"Scuba cow"

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

Goldfish bowl on raft...

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"If you hold a shell to your ear you can hear the ocean..."

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

Upper class child with toy cruise ship.

"Puss in cement boots"

"Hawaiian hitchhiker."

'Another one? Do you realize it will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

"If it's a series of patterned clicks, I'm not here."

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

Lighthouse has energy efficient light bulb.

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

Waiting for a turn to swim.

Batman O' War

"Teacher! What happens if we don't turn in our homework on time?"

Remote controlled car on a boat.

'Freedom is nice, but I miss the Circus for the applause and the three square meals a day...'

Lifesaver!