Ocean Cleaner Gifts

Fishing for Litter

Environmental disaster! Pardon? BP, the Gulf. It's madness. Think of the children! Wow, I can't believe what I'm hearing. You love big oil and hate environmentalists. But this spill has finally gotten to you. You're worried about the children? It's not just BP but all those polluters filling up the oceans with toxins. It's so selfish. If the oceans get stuffed with pollution now, where will generations to come dump their garbage? Oh, to think of our children's children having nowhere to put thei

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"At times I wonder what I've done with my life that makes me worth being saved."

'Thank-you God.'

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

The Dubloon Stops Here

Lazy Octopus

I rather like bucket and spade holidays.

'I blame global warming!'

"If you hold it to your ear you can hear the ice caps melting."

'This is where we go to get away from it all. . . except for Stanley's money.'

"The lobster dinner is thirty eight dollars, or for ten dollars extra you can have him returned to the sea."

A Preschool of Fish

'The the President we've gone surfin', surfin' U,S,A,'

Shellfie

"I'm sorry- I can barely hear you with this goddam ocean behind me."

'OTHER SIDE!!!' - Learn to Surf

"The good news is...you've one less window to wash."

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

"Next time don't use a herbed vinegar."

'I don't think that this whale is beached.'

'...I said we've been marooned.'

Cocktail glasses swimming in the sea.

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

"I don't think I can fit that into my schedule, Irv. I've got a fishing boat to attack this morning, a beach to terrorize this afternoon and a feeding frenzy this evening!"

"Are you familiar with the term, 'Catch and Release', buster?"

"I'd love to help out but I'm barely keeping my head below water now."

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'

"Oh boy, that was a huge belly-flop..."

Happy Retirement

Two sharks, one says to the other' There's a child in me just trying to get out...'

Sharks hate practical jokes.