Occasional Carnivore Gifts

'I'm a situational vegan. If someone else is paying it's an eight ounce kobi steak for me.'

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

Gazelle Pizza#:'You guys aren't interested in pizza are you?'

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A butcher and his apprentice.

'White meat or dark?'

'What?! Not even one of you wants to see how they're made?'

Cooked rare.

The Butcher of 35th street.

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'

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"Hurry, dear, it's the Brutal Gourmet."

"So who gets the rib eye and who gets the salad?"

Caveman restaurant: Oogs Pieces of cooked meet: Over one Dozen Served.

Too rare perhaps?

'Dreamy! Now how many pounds of beef can you put on one bun?'

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

'I'm amazed they had ANY meat in them.'

'Oh ya! I didn't tell you guys. I'm a vegetarian now.'

"We're wolves, Jessica. We eat veal."

"Check this out. If you pace back and forth, it hypnotizes them and they give you a steak."

'Eat my vegetables? - I thought we were supposed to be predators!'

We'll have whatever they are

'Not at all, Mr. Porker, we already have several pigs working in our company cafeteria.'

"Forget cholesterol. We eat meat, and that's that."

100% organic pork sausages

'OK, it's a deal: I'll get you a Christmas Turkey if you get me a big Salmon...'

"Two steaks, cruelly raised and brutally slaughtered. Enjoy!"

"The abattoir hasn't any butchers so you'll have to help yourself a bit more than usual."

"I don't mind being butchered. But I can't stand the thought of my legs going in one box, my breast in another, my wings in another. . ."

The good and bad news for the species is we have less fat than beef.