Compassionate Carnivore Gifts

Bacon Bits

'Supporters of vegetarianism.'

What do you mean you prefer the sound of the sign of the right?! What part of 'either way we're dead' do you not understand?

"I don't mind being butchered. But I can't stand the thought of my legs going in one box, my breast in another, my wings in another. . ."

"I thought you went vegan."

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"May I offer you a side of life insurance?"

I Heart Dinosaurs Chef

A butcher and his apprentice.

"Namasteak"

'White meat or dark?'

'What?! Not even one of you wants to see how they're made?'

"Man, what I wouldn't do for one of those free-range meals right now."

"For the health-conscious, we suggest you chase your own zebra."

Cooked rare.

The Butcher of 35th street.

'You spoil those pigeons.'

'I dunno. Maybe we need a new slogan.'

Scientists Discover the Gene for Heterosexuality in Men

Too rare perhaps?

Caveman restaurant: Oogs Pieces of cooked meet: Over one Dozen Served.

'Two thousand seedlings - and I can't bring myself to throw any of them out.'

"So who gets the rib eye and who gets the salad?"

"Hurry, dear, it's the Brutal Gourmet."

"We'll be using a pig's kidney in the transplant....Suit yourself, we'll try a turnip, good luck with that!"

"Everyone, stop looking delicious. The vegans are back and that tofurkey jerky won't keep them back much longer."

'I'm amazed they had ANY meat in them.'

'Not at all, Mr. Porker, we already have several pigs working in our company cafeteria.'

We'll have whatever they are

100% organic pork sausages

"Two steaks, cruelly raised and brutally slaughtered. Enjoy!"

"The abattoir hasn't any butchers so you'll have to help yourself a bit more than usual."

Dr Atkins on a date: 'Why does he keep looking at me like I'm a piece of meat?'

'Oh ya! I didn't tell you guys. I'm a vegetarian now.'

'OK, it's a deal: I'll get you a Christmas Turkey if you get me a big Salmon...'