Oath Keeper Gifts

'Well, that WAS an impressive string of obscenities, but I think I'll stick with the Hippocratic oath.'

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

'How do we SLEEP at night?'

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"The date protection policy is all about access to information, and we all know information is POWER!"

Mother's Love

"Unfortunately, what you downloaded from the net is a ten-year-old paper I once wrote for my college boyfriend!"

"When you promised me a lift home...."

"We're studying the legal principles of 'crossing a heart and hoping to die'."

"Again, I must remind the witness that he is under oath!"

'I'll have to keep my name after we're married.'

'Are you kidding? Of course I take this woman - wouldn't you???'

Check your conscience, Senator?

Librarian.

Boy in court swearing oath on comic book

'New Years Resolutions, paragraph 45, clause iv in which we will attempt to clarify the term 'butter buttocks'.'

"I'll do whatever it takes to save this marriage. Even if that means having to work weekends."

Introducing clean conscience products

'Yes, your wedding vows are still binding even if you DID get married during the Clinton administration.'

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

"This year, no coal for the bad guys!"

"Isn't it nice to see more bobbies on the street...?"

How To Keep Promises

"Okay, so the object of the game is to get into the most pedantic fight about the rules."

'How can you sleep at night?'

Think - But not too much.

"Well, that's that. Can't do a research homework if the internet's down."

'What wine goes with the Hippocratic Oath- my nephew graduated from medical school.'

Place you hand on the bible and repeat after me. Place your hand on the bible and repeat after me. No. Don't repeat that! No. Don't repeat that! Your honor, make him stop! You honor, make him stop! Another long day in juvenile court.

'Yes, your wedding vows are still binding even if you DID get married during the Clinton administration.'

"I've got a good head for business; I just don't have the stomach for it."

'Have you ever seen that TV ad, 'Help, I'm sitting around gossiping and can't shut up', Timmy?'

'No way you're ever going to comply with all of THAT!'

"Tom..Tom, you promised not to flame my parents..."