Novelty Ringtones Pillows

"That's cute, but you'll never realize your phone's ringing in here if your ringtone's a belch."

Dog Walking Services

'Frank built it himself. The last football will fall through the hourglass 10 seconds before the Super Bowl starts.'

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

Advocado

'You're a genius, Hoppy!'

Hay Rides $10

'Half-baked beans, low fat variety' "Who says we have no taste?"

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

Cash Machines From Across the Land

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"

Peel poker.

"This new phone app for opening the beer is great, Bruce!"

Electronics: Nooks/Crannies

"Well - I've either bought a pack of table napkins, or adopted a Siberian tiger cub..."

Crane Game. Ball Game.

'Tell your mom you coughed it up and you're guaranteed a day off from school.'

'No, I didn't know it was hunting season - why do you ask?'

"It's going to be huge! Cheese-flavored vodka!"

Micro-Brewed Brain Beer

LOL. Larry Lee Oppenheimer is no fan of monogrammed underwear.

Elton John

Family heirlooms that will never make it onto the mantelpiece.

Ball Pool Peril

Inflatable Hands with Index and Middle fingers showing on sale for spectators at a Sports Stadium Event

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

Bumper Limos

"Rats! It doesn't work...but why?? Why??!!"

Thank you for calling ace novelty..and remember, think outside the box!

Businessman with novelty in and out baskets.

Leaking backpack.

Jurassic Pork

"Relax, just watch out for his left hook."

"Run, it's a light-sabre tooth tiger."