Nostalgic Storyteller Gifts

'It's worse than we thought: You've got termites.'

"Hi Mom...do you remember in which grade I was given an award for my excellent performance of the song about little ducks?"

"When I was a kid? Well...me and your dad would just head out the back door and pick our tree!" "Wow! Grandpa owned a plastics factory!"

Grandpa says he used to have a mailbox...and somebody called a mail carrier used to put mail in it."

'Santa no longer needed me once he got that darned GPS.'

"This is Mozab. I've known him since the year one."

'Thinking back though, I'd have to say we all had a bloody good financial crisis.'

'I used to play here as a kid, but of course, that was before Humans built that sewer pipe...'

Homer

'These young social workers now nothing, I used to see 5000 clients every day...'

"This dvd of Billy's first day at school is due back in two days, Mom."

'Grandpa, tell me about the 'good old days' when luddies ruled the earth.'

"It was a long afternoon with granddad. I got five 'I remember whens' and three 'When I was your age...'."

Punch, Judy and Socky

"I had to give up my secret identity—no more phone booths."

'It was such a big tree when I was young: The Fire Brigade had to rescue me a number of times...'

Old war hero rejects mosquito sprays at his peril

'This is where I first met my wife, I swept her off her feet.'

'I used to be one of Santa's little helpers but since the boom in kids electronic toys, he's got the Japs in.'

'Your father used to like a nice, warm glass of milk while he stayed awake, waiting for Santa, too...'

Old Burglars Home

Bedtime Stories

Mom's high school diary really cracked everyone up at Show and Tell.

'I just realized that the average age of all my old friends' is 'dead'.'

'In my day, son, men didn't have rings through their noses until after they were married.'

'The easiest way to stay young is to lie about your age.'

"Having had so many kids, I thought I would see them a lot in my old age: But they're too busy with their own kids to visit..."

"Stop reminiscing!"

"In former times the kids were scared to death when I came out of their closet...nowadays when I see the stuff kids are playing on their computers I'm the one who is scared to death!"

"Your Tio Eddie was quite the crooner! He'd be the greatest singer alive today. If he was alive...and could sing."

"I can't image growing up without computers or cell phones. Your generation had it rough, huh, Dad?"

"That was my doctor...he says I need to start an exercise program...but I've never exercise a day in my life. As a youngster, I was too busy washing my family's clothes, feeding the chickens, tending the garden..."

"Grandma, how come there are no selfies of you as a kid?"

"... No, I don't mean Dave had a boring nickname at school. I mean his nickname was, 'Boring'."

"This house has been in my family for a considerable period of time."